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The Social Centre - by ChrisB

The Social Centre - February 2007

Unco Pedestrians

People should require licenses in order to walk about the streets, footpaths and shopping malls of the country.

Walkers
Look Out! unco walkers about!
If you wish to drive a car, you must first prove by a series of tests that you are in control, and aware of what you are doing. If you swerve about constantly and bump into other vehicles consistently, then you are not legally allowed to drive a motor vehicle on public roads. Simple.




There are far too many uncoordinated people wandering aimlessly on our walking grounds.

No doubt you have seen them, meandering with a glazed look in their eye, mis-stepping and tripping up all behind them.

They turn abruptly and violently in the middle of a busy walking stream, bumping into innocent victims, and shrugging it off with a piss-weak “oh sorry….”

They stop and have gatherings in the middle of a vital walking route, bottlenecking the traffic as they discuss the day’s events.

They alternate their walking pace infrequently, decelerating from a power-stroll to a slow shuffle without warning, before blazing off again in a mad rush.

They walk with their heads slightly tilted back, confused and indecisive, switching walking tangents randomly to the frustration of those stuck behind them.

These people are dangerous.

Often they travel in herds, making passing extremely difficult; risking an overtaking manoeuvre can often end up in a mangled confrontation with an oncoming trolley.

There should be some sort of walking education facility where unco-walkers can be sent should they prove to be a menace to our pedestrian precincts.

Am I the only one who suffers the frustration of being constantly wrong-footed by these mindless, clumsy walking retards?
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Live Earth concerts to cool the planet

On July 7th this year, a huge series of concerts are set to take place in all continents on Earth, including Antartica.

Al Gore
Al Gore
Environmental warriors Al Gore, Kevin Wall, Pharrell Williams and Cameron Diaz who recently launched S.O.S (Save Our Selves), a campaign aiming to battle climate change, are behind the ambitious project called Live Earth


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Tenacious D: The Pick of Destiny review plus trailer

Tenacious D
The D in action


If shredding monster jams, screeching in an offensive falsetto and kicking holes in amplifiers floats your boat, then Tenacious D: The Pick of Destiny is the movie you’ve been waiting for


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Overcoming addiction: Spider Solitaire

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Fat Kids

A few millennia ago, Moses cast upon the Egyptian Pharaoh ten deadly plagues. With use of battering hail, crop-ravaging locusts and painful ailments to name a few, Moses certainly kicked some Pharaoh arse with some truly devastating plagues.

Fat Kids invading album covers
Oh the humanity!!

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