It's a Conspiracy!
Artist's rendering of a reptilian based on witness accounts
Lizard people rule the earth
It’s simple really: everyone wealthy, influential, good-looking or famous is actually an intergalactic reptilian member of an evil secret society, taking human form to assimilate with the population it intends to annihilate. Former Coventry goalkeeper and BBC reporter David Icke dropped this shocking bombshell in the early 1990s and has been on a mission to convince the ‘unawares’ ever since.
Icke revealed that the Royal Family, George Bush, the Rockefellers and Boxcar Willie were just some belonging to the Babylonian Brotherhood, a secret race of shape-shifting dinosaur-like beings, fuelled by intrinsic hatred and a thirst for human blood. He says these creatures take human shape so they can attain positions of power and wealth to fund their diabolical plot – to take over the universe.
Icke’s theory is a novel extension of the ‘elite secret society’ conspiracy that has existed ever since peasantry felt bitter about paying taxes. He shed new light on the well-documented theories surrounding surreptitious organisations like the Illuminati, the New World Order, and the McDonald’s of the conspiracy world - the Freemasons.
The reptilians’ true form has never been captured on film, however by piecing together the several incontrovertible witness accounts, an image takes shape: ‘TAL’ says: “They wore no clothes. But, they did have a "UTILITY BELT…. glow" an electrical blue/greenish color…. And the head was more cone shaped” Herb Sherner of Nebraska reported their: “eyes were the one thing I will never forget... THE PUPIL WENT UP AND DOWN LIKE A SLIT. When they looked at me they stared straight into my eyes. They didn’t blink. It was REAL uncomfortable”. Meanwhile, others report “they had no discernible lips, just straight lines for mouths,” "powerful limbs” and "Iguanodon-like hands.” Jeffery Souza from Brazil even informs us that their blood pressure is “80/50” and their body temperature is “ambient”.
These testimonials form merely part of the damning evidence. Ancient Summerian tablets warn of the ‘Anunnaki’ – beings coming to earth from the heavens, and even cartoons are offering hints. Just watch an episode of Dino Squad for a lesson in reptilian subversion. The irresistibly appealing dinosaur-based plot device is in fact, clever propaganda to instil younger generations with sympathy and awe for their future reptilian masters.
Icke has admitted that the reptilians have been slippery customers when it comes to capturing and documenting, but he explained it is because the cold-blooded ones exist within several ‘sense dimensions’ beyond our measly five. This means they can basically get around and wreak their scaly havoc without leaving any trace. There could well be one standing behind you right now, sizing you up for dinner. Or at least eyeing off your wallet.
Proof!
Nazis are on the Moon
We all know about the infamous moon landing scandal. Did the US stage the 1969 moon landing in a dingy basement in Arizona? Were Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin daytime TV actors whose agents booked them a lifetime gig? Who knows? What is certain, however, is that someone did land on the moon. His name was Adolf Hitler, and he got there in 1942… where he remains today.
The thing is, the Americans had their little 1969 moon miniseries all wrong. The costumes, scenery, props… everything was far removed from what the moon is really like. Renown moon expert, Vladimir Terziski reveals “man does not need a space suit to walk on the Moon. A pair of jeans, a pullover and sneakers are just about enough.” Essentially, the grey, inhospitable, cratered wasteland NASA told us was the moon was just a way of keeping third world countries from finding out the moon is actually a luxurious oasis in the barren expanses of space.
Terziski went there to investigate the Nazi menace that we all thought was eradicated in 1945, but in fact had relocated to the warm, sunny climes of the moon. He discovered Hitler and his aides have been enjoying a relaxing retirement there ever since, as were some Japanese generals who drove them there in his space-Mitsubishi. It was there Hitler and chums met several alien races, including the malicious reptilian overlord race, to whom Hitler officially delegated his task of widespread genocide. (see above)
Now the Americans and Soviets have also taken out some moon real estate, bringing the moon’s population to around 40,000 happy residents. All hostilities between the three parties seem to have ended. Instead they’re blissfully whittling away their autumn years roaming about in comfy loafers and playing moon shuffleboard.
The Heavenly battle: glorious sylphs attack the chemtrails
Chemtrails
The ‘Government mind control’ theory is possibly one of the most prevalent paranoias in crackpot circles. There is a general understanding that The Government, being evil and all that, go to unprecedented and extraordinary lengths to trample the flowerbed of morality with impunity and control the minds of its citizens. According to the informed few, the only thing keeping us paying taxes and parking where we’re told to, is The Government’s diabolical mind control technology.
There are several theories about how The Government has managed to reign us all in. Electronic V-Chip implants was one theory popular in the post-war height of freaking out, while more recently barcodes and flu vaccines have been singled out as camouflaged mind control agents. However, one of the most imaginative - and truly ambitious - of the theories is that of chemtrails.
According to the experts, what you or I would wrongly call a streaky cloud or lingering jet exhaust, is in fact residue from government-facilitated mind control chemical spraying operations. Now The Government-compliant meteorologists will try to tell you they are harmless cirrus clouds, but remember, that’s just too convenient. Thankfully, there are several ways you can combat the evil with your very own orgone generator , which will “transmute the atmospheric orgone energy envelope from one polarity ('DOR') which allow chemtrails to persist, to another orgone polarity ('OR') which will cause chemtrails to disperse” Better yet, ancient mystical sky guardians called ‘sylphs’ have entered the battle against chemtrails. These sylphs originally intervened to prevent the Cold War from becoming World War Three, so we know they’re on our side. There is an epic battle between good and evil in the skies; our very lives depend on it. And you all thought they’re clusters of water vapour that occasionally look like elephants…
Dead man walking (second from left)
Paul McCartney is Dead
By 1966 The Beatles were the global phenomenon. Lava lamps, beards and sit-down protests were widely enjoyed – but The Beatles were unprecedentedly successful - a money-making juggernaut reaching, breaking and exciting hearts in all four corners of the globe. Even sliced bread knew its time was up. It was therefore a setback of biblical proportions when Paul McCartney wrapped his car around a tree and died.
According to learned truth-seekers, the band’s record executives were so anxious about the potential loss of sales a dead band member would have, they decided to find a look-alike with a liverpudlian accent, plonk a bowl cut wig on him and thrust a bass guitar in his hands. Naturally John, George and Ringo completely understood the bold decision and played along. New Paul was to seamlessly slip in and replace Dead Paul, not just as part of the Fab Four, but also in private life.
The story broke into the mainstream in 1969, when rumours of certain clues left behind by the band spread to the airwaves of New York. These clues were direct references to Paul’s death – for instance John Lennon’s parting remarks at the end of Strawberry Field Forever sounded awfully like “I buried Paul,” (though the McCartney impostor would later try to claim Lennon was actually saying “Cranberry Sauce”). More evidence was founds on album covers, for example, on the famous Abbey Road cover, we see John dressed as a clergyman, Ringo dressed as a mourner and George as a grave-digger. Paul, meanwhile, is not wearing shoes and is out of step … just like a zombie would be. Even more cryptic is the St Peppers cover, which seemed to depict a funeral, and if you place a mirror across the words ‘LONELY HEARTS’ on the bass drum, ‘1 ONEI X HE DIE’ appears, with an arrow pointing up to Paul. Coincidence? Dozens think not!
These are but some of the veritable suite of evidence collated by cluey fans over the years. Ringo, the only surviving Beatle, continues to deny the Paul replacement conspiracy – but not even he can explain McCartney’s post-Beatles career with Wings.
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